Depression Hell ....

[guyscliffe]

I have suffered quite badly from depression in the past and its always a difficult one to deal with. Especially as i found that most people in society dont really understand it which doesnt really help at all!

One thing you should forget about straight away is the idea that staying at home for x amounts of weeks is going to cure your depression. I know everyone is different but sitting at home without anything to do was for me the worst thing to do. If your mind is not occupied then it is almost inevitable that a depressed mind will turn to dark thoughts!

i would suggest the best thing to do is try to get back on the horse as soon as possible. After a long time off work its always going to be extremely hard and will probably add to your stress levels which sounds counter productive i know. some short term discomfort will help your long term recovery massively! You will have to go back and face work and other people eventually so its better to get it out of the way asap then you can concentrate on getting better. Doing something productive with yourself and getting back to a routine will help you concentate less on some of the dark stuff going on in your life and help you focus on other things.

Good luck with whatever you decide though mate and hope you start feeling better soon

Hi Sippin40oz ....
Sitting at home is not an option ....
Was told right from the outset,to get out and about.
Be it walking,swimming,cycling etc .....
Am also walkin a neighbours dog short term,given that she is recovering from a major operation.
I am also suffering a few physical problems as well,which according my GP are all depression related.
So yea,am gettin out and about ....

[Planemadpostie]

Hi i have been through somthing similar,when my dad died i did as much work as possible to forget,but it caught up with me years later.I Was lucky as i had some good people on my walk that helped me,but some days when you dont see anyone i can slip back. If you feel ready get out there but dont expect much help from managment,it depends how you feel about the job.The only advice i can give is to try your best each day .thats what keeps me going. Hope you feel better soon

[REDLETTER]

Stay out of the game as long as you think you need too.

Nothing worse that going back then find that elderly customer(s), you talk to every day have passed away, it knocked me for six, still find it hard when that happens now.

Getting out and about is the answer for some to stave off the potential of the downward spiral, just wished some of the RM management understood depression a bit better!

[krussel]

Just reading your first post is enough to see why you have had trouble coping as you have been through a hell of lot of stress and anyone would be marked by it. I don’t normally get too personal on here but I can relate to a couple of things you mentioned

I became quite depressed and found myself on medication when my marriage fell apart.
Around the same time I suffered a massive inner ear infection which was unbelievable demoralising and really difficult to try to describe to anyone who has not suffered the same. I got to the stage were I felt dizzy and sick all the time, like being drunk without the enjoyment factor. I would get off the sofa and try to walk out the door and go smack into the wall ! It sounds funny now but at the time it just brought me to tears. ( i could go on, dont know how bad yours is)

Now that alone would make anyone depressed despite the terrible ordeal you have been through watching your father pass away. It always even more difficult if you are so close by as you not only have to cope with your own grief but support and comfort your mothers as well, not an easy job .

Being a Postie is quite a solitary existence and especially now your out on your own for up to 5 hours . Things do go around in your head whilst you walk around. I found a radio or more recently an MP3 audio book helps to take my mind of my troubles.

Best of luck mate and well done for coming on here. I think you will be surprised how many of us have been through similar things.

Take care

[guyscliffe]

Just reading your first post is enough to see why you have had trouble coping as you have been through a hell of lot of stress and anyone would be marked by it. I don’t normally get too personal on here but I can relate to a couple of things you mentioned

I became quite depressed and found myself on medication when my marriage fell apart.
Around the same time I suffered a massive inner ear infection which was unbelievable demoralising and really difficult to try to describe to anyone who has not suffered the same. I got to the stage were I felt dizzy and sick all the time, like being drunk without the enjoyment factor. I would get off the sofa and try to walk out the door and go smack into the wall ! It sounds funny now but at the time it just brought me to tears. ( i could go on, dont know how bad yours is)

Now that alone would make anyone depressed despite the terrible ordeal you have been through watching your father pass away. It always even more difficult if you are so close by as you not only have to cope with your own grief but support and comfort your mothers as well, not an easy job .

Being a Postie is quite a solitary existence and especially now your out on your own for up to 5 hours . Things do go around in your head whilst you walk around. I found a radio or more recently an MP3 audio book helps to take my mind of my troubles.

Best of luck mate and well done for coming on here. I think you will be surprised how many of us have been through similar things.

Take care

Thanks Krussel .... My ear infection is improving,thankfully ...The swelling and pain have gone,to leave a muffled feeling behind[similar to getting water in your ear,from swimming/showering]
Am determined to get through this,but am gonna do so with the experts holding my hand,I think ...
Thanks again for your kinds words ....

[sidewinder]

Keep in there pal. You'll come through it.

[BELIAL]

f**k the shitty job and the shitty managers and their shitty rules. Perspective rules,good luck brother

[smokerjim]

I would say the best you can do is listen to your GP & ATOS ( how often do we hear of ATOS contradicting GPs / consultants / specialists in their field, etc? ), and I don't know if you are on any kind of drug therapy, but ask, beg and demand talk therapy ( that could be Cognitive Behavior Therapy, which instead of tracing the root of your problems teaches you to think of them as less of a problem, sounds like it won't work, but it did for me, until the funding was cut last year....long story...or you could have the head shrinking I'm having now, I've just started it, and I don't know if it will help, but if I get told that my history is of no consequence to my depression that will help & I can still go back to CBT ).

Waiting lists vary, but from going to my GP and saying I feel suicidal to getting into CBT took the thick end of a year.....so it might help to contact RM's HELP line ( I was just getting to my wit's end, called them up & they arranged 3 sessions for me....rubbish for curing depression, but just before my final session, I got the start date for CBT ), they might be able to help you, and if you need more help after, I doubt they will tell you to sod off

In the short term, get yourself an MP3 player ( 8gb min, imho - much less you will be constantly swapping tracks, or getting bored of what is on there ), if that costs too much, get yourself a wee small radio with a few presets, I go for stuff like Radio 4, 5 Live, X-fm, Absolute ( a choice of talk stations, when the weather is s**t & you just want to walk at a steady pace & a choice of rock stations for when I want to step up the pace....choice i9s good, especially if a song / band / phone in topic pisses you off, drags you down, etc )

Also check with your rep / H&S rep / Area rep to see if it is worth getting in contact with ATOS, and say to them that you do not feel able to perform your current duties, however, you do want to have some structure back in your life, would they object if you did some voluntary work ( local hospital shop, or charity shop or something ) a few hours a week or something....as much as RM have driven me clean up the f***ing wall, if I was stuck at home, with my wife ( also with depression ), I would be a lot worse or dead by now....I hate to say it, but going into work has been a small island of sanity ( with most of my colleagues building sea walls, and most of the managers raising sea levels ), if you can get something similar, once or twice a week, it should help, and you'll be meeting people, making new friends, and feeling good about yourself.

Right, I'm sure to have missed a few things, but that's most of the bases covered...life aint easy ( RM don't always help ), but every test REALLY does make you stronger

[smokerjim]

PS, I know I said about getting some voluntary work or something, but DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE RETURN TO YOUR OFFICE, OR GET PRESSURED TO DO SO, UNLESS CLEARED BY ATOS AND YOUR GP, because if you return too soon & still have physical symptoms, when things get hard, they will flare up again, make it harder for you to complete your work and you will immediately be on a downward spiral of physical symptom, fail to finish my work, feel pressure, physical symptom, fail to finish my work, etc, etc,

If you need anything, you can get it ( from us, from your GP / ATOS, even from RM ) but you'll never need a relapse, so as tempting as work is, don't rush into it.

[TeeferTiger]

I'm sorry for your losses and I can full sympathise with the ear infection.

My advice, having been thru the sickness and worrying about coming back is to not worry about it. It won't help you get better any quicker, and it's not the sort of illness that will get better with worry. You must not go back to work until your GP and ATOS says you are ready. If you ignore Dr's orders and something happens, RM will shaft you for it.

Just concentrate on getting better and leave the other stuff until you're ready to deal with it.

[Poatmanjones]

I am currently going through the same situation

At the start of the year i lost my dad through liver/bowel cancer we only knew how serious it was on the 29th dec when his doctor finally relised he wasnt a well man (that after months of being fobbed off) and he had to enter hospital on january 2nd he had passed away.

i think we were due back on the 4th jan??? but i was given 5days special leave once this had expired i was called by phone and asked would i be back in work the next day i said no so was asked to go in and speak to the manager.

To cut a long story short im now off with stress and feel very depressed i also have a number of other issues i need to deal with ie trying to keep the council house i live in, dealing with the payment of funeral which i cant afford, but the big issue is my manager in my opionion is basically bullying me back to work through phone calls and also makes me go into work to speak with him, and hes also said rm may try medically retire me?? im only 31 and have been a good worker for 10 yrs in the company.

I start councelling on monday and have a 4 week sick note which i got yesterday but i still have to go and see the manager again friday, is he acting fairly and correctly??? hes just making me feel worse

PS sorry for rambling on but i needed to get it off my chest

[POSTMAN]

Jones,don't go in to work and see your manager,also ask him/her not to phone you,deal with everything by letter mate,and tell them that's the way it's going to be.
They are not doctors or counsellors!

Best wishes to all in this thread.

[guyscliffe]

Jones,don't go in to work and see your manager,also ask him/her not to phone you,deal with everything by letter mate,and tell them that's the way it's going to be.
They are not doctors or counsellors!

Best wishes to all in this thread.

Many thanks,Postman ....

Just been in to see the boss today,as I needed to sign for a walk[the resign has got down to me]
Only to find that i'm unable to sign for my walk of 16 yrs,because its a driving duty now[under the new van share system]
Thats really going to help my rehibilitation,when I eventually get the all clear to go back to work.
Having known my customers for so many years,they have mostly all been of great help and sympathetic to my cause ....
24 yrs service with RM,to be fobbed off,essentially ....

[TeeferTiger]

At least your manager is contacting you... I've had to chase mine for months lol

I don't think they want me back

[krussel]

In the short term, get yourself an MP3 player ( 8gb min, imho - much less you will be constantly swapping tracks, or getting bored of what is on there ), if that costs too much,

Totally agree with Jim here and for me it made a big difference at work and at home. An 8gb is a good start but i started with a really cheap £10 1GB player from Argos. It could hold quite a few books. Try librivox as there are 1000,s of public domain books which are free.

I found listen to a book really helped at night when i was not tired and could not sleep.

http://librivox.org/newcatalog/search.p ... ion=Search" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Also you can download podcasts from various radio station websites during the day and listen at night.