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farting at work
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opgpat
- Posts: 878
- Joined: 08 Oct 2007, 21:56
Re: farting at work
There was a really terrible farty small at work today, traced to the canteen kitchen, no joke.
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Pinky 1
- Posts: 1510
- Joined: 01 Mar 2009, 11:38
- Gender: Male
- Location: Wales
Re: farting at work
Hey opgpat, what's a "farty small" mate ? ..... 
"Cara yn bod 'n briod , dydy 'n fawr at ca a hun 'n anad berson a 'ch angen at blina achos 'r bwyso chan 'ch buchedd "
" I like being married,, it's great to find that one special person you want to bother for the rest of your life "
" I like being married,, it's great to find that one special person you want to bother for the rest of your life "
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TrueBlueTerrier
- FORUM ADMINISTRATOR
- Posts: 72773
- Joined: 30 Dec 2006, 10:29
- Gender: Male
- Location: On my couch
Re: farting at work
I actually thought about this thread today when I got onto the bus after finishing my walk. Of course some of my customers were on the bus and I felt this build up. I thought I could hang on till I got back off and walked into DO, but knew at one point I couldn't. Decided to try and sneak one out, did not work let out a loud cheek flapper of one and no one on the bus could have failed to hear it. I might walk back in tomorrow 
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opgpat
- Posts: 878
- Joined: 08 Oct 2007, 21:56
Re: farting at work
must have been thinking about my LM lol, should be 'farty smell'Pinky 1 wrote:Hey opgpat, what's a "farty small" mate ? .....
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Thunderthighs
- Posts: 990
- Joined: 14 Jul 2009, 19:42
- Gender: Male
Re: farting at work
I was 11, first year in High School and during lunch time, I couldn't hold a hugh BELLY BULGE build up.
I tried to let it out...silent but deadly...but, PPPPPARRRPPPPPHHHH !!! It was the loudest fart EVER!
Just like when the good guy walks into the bad guy's saloon, the whole canteen went quiet.
( I still blame the plastic school chairs.)
Then, the on-duty teacher, Mr Jack Thomas - we called him Tom Jones cos of his 60's sideburns - shouted "DAVIES! Don't Ever do that again!!!"
Luckily, for me, he blamed the lad next to me. Result!
Then about 5 mins later, I saw the really funny side of it, and let out a manic, cold, evil laugh, HHHAAAAAA!!!! No facial expression, but a cold, evil laugh.
Mr Thomas shot a stone-cold stare at me, thinking I had gone totally mad. He wasn't far wrong...
I tried to let it out...silent but deadly...but, PPPPPARRRPPPPPHHHH !!! It was the loudest fart EVER!
Just like when the good guy walks into the bad guy's saloon, the whole canteen went quiet.
( I still blame the plastic school chairs.)
Then, the on-duty teacher, Mr Jack Thomas - we called him Tom Jones cos of his 60's sideburns - shouted "DAVIES! Don't Ever do that again!!!"
Luckily, for me, he blamed the lad next to me. Result!
Then about 5 mins later, I saw the really funny side of it, and let out a manic, cold, evil laugh, HHHAAAAAA!!!! No facial expression, but a cold, evil laugh.
Mr Thomas shot a stone-cold stare at me, thinking I had gone totally mad. He wasn't far wrong...
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bexhil palace
- Posts: 505
- Joined: 18 Jul 2007, 11:54
- Gender: Male
- Location: All over the Gaff
Re: farting at work
Once dropped my guts in a lift in a block of rather posh flats on my walk,to say it stank,would be an understatement.
as the lift reached the ground floor and the door opened, there before me stood a very well dressed lady in all her finery.
Good morning i offered with a beaming smile,good morning she replied, and i continued on my way waiting for the reek to assault her nostrils.
I didn't have long to wait,within seconds she was bringing up her gizzards with gusto.One of the most enjoyable moments on delivery that iv'e had.
as the lift reached the ground floor and the door opened, there before me stood a very well dressed lady in all her finery.
Good morning i offered with a beaming smile,good morning she replied, and i continued on my way waiting for the reek to assault her nostrils.
I didn't have long to wait,within seconds she was bringing up her gizzards with gusto.One of the most enjoyable moments on delivery that iv'e had.
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bandit650
- Posts: 880
- Joined: 14 Aug 2007, 15:42
- Gender: Female
Re: farting at work
Has anyone ever been asleep in the dead of night farted so loud that it woke everyone up in the house,well my sister did so you could imagine everyones comments at home so when one of the guys did it so loud on the sorting everyone fell about laughing but the gov was well monked off with him had him to one side explaining to him that that was not the done thing next morning can of air freshener was on top of the sorting frames.
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Exrep
- Posts: 1005
- Joined: 02 Oct 2009, 21:01
- Gender: Male
Re: farting at work
Bandit had a little chuckle there about your DIM what a sad fecker to pull the postie to one side and have a word.
Our boss has once asked other people who the culprits been to a really smelly trump ,when hes got no answer hes seen looking like a merecat peering down the aisles to see if he can spot them himself. Its a picture to behold if i catch him at it over the next couple of weeks i will try and snap him and ill put him up ( Consequences i no about ) but hey lifes so grim in R/M at the mo lets just have a chuckle over it and i will deal with the fall out if it happens.
Our boss has once asked other people who the culprits been to a really smelly trump ,when hes got no answer hes seen looking like a merecat peering down the aisles to see if he can spot them himself. Its a picture to behold if i catch him at it over the next couple of weeks i will try and snap him and ill put him up ( Consequences i no about ) but hey lifes so grim in R/M at the mo lets just have a chuckle over it and i will deal with the fall out if it happens.
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
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cardiff-nights
- MAIL CENTRES/PROCESSING
- Posts: 35
- Joined: 20 May 2009, 20:13
- Gender: Male
Re: farting at work
the way things are going, you could end up in the s**t if you fart (so to speak) 
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Thunderthighs
- Posts: 990
- Joined: 14 Jul 2009, 19:42
- Gender: Male
Re: farting at work
Cardiff nights?...CARDIFF NIGHTS?!!! I could tell you 'bout Cardiff nights! Top Rank, Tito's, Fatso's, The Spanish Bodega wine bar, Lloyds, Flagstones, etc, etc.
Been thrown out of all of these in my time, LOL! Ask your Dad/Grandad. The 80's was THE Decade to be in Kairdiff, boyo...
Been thrown out of all of these in my time, LOL! Ask your Dad/Grandad. The 80's was THE Decade to be in Kairdiff, boyo...
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cardiff-nights
- MAIL CENTRES/PROCESSING
- Posts: 35
- Joined: 20 May 2009, 20:13
- Gender: Male
Re: farting at work
i am old enough to remember some of the 80s myself,although frequented more seedier than the above mentioned establishmentsThunderthighs wrote:Cardiff nights?...CARDIFF NIGHTS?!!! I could tell you 'bout Cardiff nights! Top Rank, Tito's, Fatso's, The Spanish Bodega wine bar, Lloyds, Flagstones, etc, etc.
Been thrown out of all of these in my time, LOL! Ask your Dad/Grandad. The 80's was THE Decade to be in Kairdiff, boyo...
, funnily enough i tended to get the red card from some of those aswell -
TrueBlueTerrier
- FORUM ADMINISTRATOR
- Posts: 72773
- Joined: 30 Dec 2006, 10:29
- Gender: Male
- Location: On my couch
Re: farting at work
Tiger Bay used to be a popular drinking area when I was down that way. 
All post by me in Green are Admin Posts.
Any post in any other colour is my own responsibility.
If you like a news story I posted please click the link to show support Any news stories you can't post - PM me with a link
My sharing of news articles should not be interpreted as an endorsement or condemnation of any particular viewpoint or the issues presented. I share them solely for informational purposes.
Any post in any other colour is my own responsibility.
If you like a news story I posted please click the link to show support Any news stories you can't post - PM me with a link
My sharing of news articles should not be interpreted as an endorsement or condemnation of any particular viewpoint or the issues presented. I share them solely for informational purposes.
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POSTMAN
- SITE ADMINISTRATOR
- Posts: 32819
- Joined: 07 Aug 2006, 03:19
- Gender: Male
Re: farting at work
Please note that the IB are looking in. 
So try not to describe your fart smell exactly!
So try not to describe your fart smell exactly!
I Wrote-During Covid-Which is still relevant now
It's good to get these types of threads, the ridiculous my manager said bollox, so we can reassure ourselves that while the world is falling apart, Royal Mail managers are still being the low-life C***S they have always been.
My BFF Clash
The daily grind of having to argue your case with an intellectual pigmy of a line manager is physically and emotionally draining.
It's good to get these types of threads, the ridiculous my manager said bollox, so we can reassure ourselves that while the world is falling apart, Royal Mail managers are still being the low-life C***S they have always been.
My BFF Clash
The daily grind of having to argue your case with an intellectual pigmy of a line manager is physically and emotionally draining.
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aldothelad
- Posts: 18
- Joined: 20 Mar 2010, 09:01
- Gender: Male
Re: farting at work
jaylime wrote:This is one of the funniest post ive seen in ages.I have a story.A dirty horrible fat PHG dropped a pipebomb in the bogs one morning ive never seen anything as large.Subsequently the cleaner(who wasnt a full pan of chips)had to get a kettle of hot water and a stick to break it up.Ive never laughed so much at work.And yes dragging a big beer fart down an IPS alley is rather funny aswell.
