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POSTMANS UNIVERSAL LAWS

Postal workers discussion forum. Discuss the day to day life in a Blue Shirt.
TrueBlueTerrier
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Post by TrueBlueTerrier »

Why when your pouching off dead letters at a Postbox and you've obviously put some letters in do they say "Are you empting it" - "of course I am I've got a special RM Stealth van parked nearby that's why you cant see it."
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Wilbur Spoons
Posts: 136
Joined: 07 Jun 2007, 20:12

Post by Wilbur Spoons »

I was delivering once in a slightly different order to the regular bloke. At about 12pm some woman in her 40's comes to the door dressed in her pyjamas and dressing gown.
'Why is the post so late these days?' she said
'Because I'm s**t' I replied 'Now why does it take you so long to get dressed every day?'

She scurried back inside, I was waiting for a complaint the next day but nothing happened. SHOUTING AT CUSTOMERS FTW!!! :nana :nana :nana
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smokerjim
Posts: 1921
Joined: 13 Jun 2007, 22:27
Gender: Male
Location: In a corner, thinking "I've picked a bad week to give up smoking..."

Post by smokerjim »

bluebeard wrote:What about when when you deliver a box or package and they say "it isnt ticking is it" drives me mad
You should say "No, but it was buzzing and gently vibrating earlier!" :shock: :shock: :crazy:
I don't suppose your mouth bleeds every 28 days, does it?

Mail delivery; those that can, do, those that can't, MANAGE!
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tyconuk
Posts: 203
Joined: 09 Jun 2007, 19:14
Location: Cheshire

Post by tyconuk »

this is a good one i like.
"ifs its bills you can keep them"
too which i reply, with a cheeky smile
" sorry its not bills, its yours"!
then sometime they say "postman with a sense of humor"
"no just :crazy: , have a nice day now" :nana
Delivery:- delivery office near Stockport
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postierg
Posts: 33
Joined: 22 Jun 2007, 07:01
Location: rg area

Post by postierg »

notice how they all think the remarks they make are original, makes me chuckle,

had a recorded one day and the woman came to the door, signed and said thank you postie,
i said, thats ok mrs ...............( insert name ),
she asked how i knew her name?
i told i had a clue from the name on the envelope
she stared open mouthed, as though it was magic lol :nana :nana :nana
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POSTMAN
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Post by POSTMAN »

Its worse when you cay "Cheers mate" to a butt ugly bird with short hair :oops: :d'oh!
I Wrote-During Covid-Which is still relevant now
It's good to get these types of threads, the ridiculous my manager said bollox, so we can reassure ourselves that while the world is falling apart, Royal Mail managers are still being the low-life C***S they have always been.
My BFF Clash
The daily grind of having to argue your case with an intellectual pigmy of a line manager is physically and emotionally draining.
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gasandproud
Posts: 46
Joined: 17 Jun 2007, 15:59

Post by gasandproud »

excuse me mate do you know how to get to[destination] pisses me off ,like i aint got better things to do like get out the rain and f**k off home
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waffler
Posts: 149
Joined: 27 May 2007, 22:11
Location: South East

Post by waffler »

Customer-: Must keep you fit postie. . :Very Happy
Postie-: Yeah, fit to drop. . . :arrrghhh
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vigilante
Posts: 1155
Joined: 20 May 2007, 19:13
Gender: Male
Location: dangerously close

wind up

Post by vigilante »

the one that really really p******s me off is when im emptying a box at a PO after clearing it
and there's always the one thats flies out of the car and says ' can you wait a minute while i get a stamp on this.
Oh yes sir/madam perhaps i can drive you to asda to get your weekly shopping before i go home because that letter of yours is more important than the thousand in this bag isn't it.
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L Tommo
Posts: 3165
Joined: 06 Feb 2007, 09:43
Gender: Male
Location: WATCHING YOU WATCHING ME!

THE MATE BIT....

Post by L Tommo »

POSTMAN wrote:Its worse when you cay "Cheers mate" to a butt ugly bird with short hair :oops: :d'oh!
I always call everyone "MATE" as its friendly and even if its a Woman or bloke or kid I dont see the problem???

Had some nutty bitch once moan after i called her mate, She went mental :crazy: and shouted at me. (in uniform) "Postman your soooo rude i will report u." :mad

So i replyed, "how do you know im a man?" "I could be a transgender post person so dont be so sexist.." :no no She stood there opened mouthed as i walked off... :shock: :crazy:

PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN GLASS HOUSES SHOULDNT THROW STONES... :no no


OUT ... MATES!!!
L TOMMO.... ILLEGITIMIS NON CARBORUNDUM........

EAST LONDON MAIL CENTER-ISHHHH
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madelin4
Posts: 1220
Joined: 04 Jun 2007, 16:56

Post by madelin4 »

waffler wrote:Customer-: Must keep you fit postie. . :Very Happy
Postie-: Yeah, fit to drop. . . :arrrghhh
i like.... :funneh
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POSTMAN
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Re: THE MATE BIT....

Post by POSTMAN »

L Tommo wrote:
POSTMAN wrote:Its worse when you cay "Cheers mate" to a butt ugly bird with short hair :oops: :d'oh!
I always call everyone "MATE" as its friendly and even if its a Woman or bloke or kid I dont see the problem???

Had some nutty bitch once moan after i called her mate, She went mental :crazy: and shouted at me. (in uniform) "Postman your soooo rude i will report u." :mad

So i replyed, "how do you know im a man?" "I could be a transgender post person so dont be so sexist.." :no no She stood there opened mouthed as i walked off... :shock: :crazy:

PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN GLASS HOUSES SHOULDNT THROW STONES... :no no


OUT ... MATES!!!
Blokes/mate,old birds/dear,MILFS/love and hotties/Babe :dance
I Wrote-During Covid-Which is still relevant now
It's good to get these types of threads, the ridiculous my manager said bollox, so we can reassure ourselves that while the world is falling apart, Royal Mail managers are still being the low-life C***S they have always been.
My BFF Clash
The daily grind of having to argue your case with an intellectual pigmy of a line manager is physically and emotionally draining.
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smokerjim
Posts: 1921
Joined: 13 Jun 2007, 22:27
Gender: Male
Location: In a corner, thinking "I've picked a bad week to give up smoking..."

Re: THE MATE BIT....

Post by smokerjim »

POSTMAN wrote:
L Tommo wrote:
POSTMAN wrote:Its worse when you cay "Cheers mate" to a butt ugly bird with short hair :oops: :d'oh!
I always call everyone "MATE" as its friendly and even if its a Woman or bloke or kid I dont see the problem???

Had some nutty bitch once moan after i called her mate, She went mental :crazy: and shouted at me. (in uniform) "Postman your soooo rude i will report u." :mad

So i replyed, "how do you know im a man?" "I could be a transgender post person so dont be so sexist.." :no no She stood there opened mouthed as i walked off... :shock: :crazy:

PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN GLASS HOUSES SHOULDNT THROW STONES... :no no


OUT ... MATES!!!


:funneh :funneh :funneh
Blokes/mate,old birds/dear,MILFS/love and hotties/Babe :dance
Did you get that info from your DRAW group, postman?
I don't suppose your mouth bleeds every 28 days, does it?

Mail delivery; those that can, do, those that can't, MANAGE!
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Jan Molby
Posts: 21
Joined: 19 Jul 2007, 16:06

Post by Jan Molby »

yup
Last edited by Jan Molby on 18 Oct 2007, 22:35, edited 1 time in total.
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IWW Fellow Worker
Posts: 3644
Joined: 30 May 2007, 14:27
Gender: Male

Post by IWW Fellow Worker »

jockthearab wrote:you can almost guarntee you never get that young very attractive women answering the door in her very short nightee
the only ones I get is old grannies
When you're my age, they're almost always young.
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