A postie walks into an estate agents........

[BELIAL]

Or , I'm not sure so I'll take it back to the office and get the manager to give me his opinion, but recent experience does suggest, that on the balance of probability it could be a bulk posting of P45's

[NWpostie]

I am a postie but am temp in another office doing driving duties which is all new to me ( well it was 3 months back )

1st week in the job one of the 3 schools phones up and complains that i had included mail for others in their mail .

Not really a massive deal is it .... give it to the janny to post or give it to me the next day for god sake .

I went in the next day to the most bitter looking b*tch youve ever seen . All she is is the receptionist . She lectures me about putting others mail in hers . I explain im new and the 3 schools are all next to each others in the frame and also some mail get stuck together and maybe that was what happened . She then goes on and on and on and i just said to her it must be great being perfect and how well she mustve done when she started her job with no mistakes at the beginning .

Now i go in and drop the mail on her desk and leave without even looking at her . Another woman says good morning to me whenever she is in the office with her and i make a point having a laugh with her in front of the devil b*tch .

My question is ......... WHAT THE F*CK IS HER PROBLEM ? ? Does it matter if there was ONE or a HUNDRED miss sorts in her mail ?? What the hell is it to her ??

Rant over

I think her problem was she is not getting "it" and Vibrator is stuck in the Post

[smokerjim]

I am a postie but am temp in another office doing driving duties which is all new to me ( well it was 3 months back )

1st week in the job one of the 3 schools phones up and complains that i had included mail for others in their mail .

Not really a massive deal is it .... give it to the janny to post or give it to me the next day for god sake .

I went in the next day to the most bitter looking b*tch youve ever seen . All she is is the receptionist . She lectures me about putting others mail in hers . I explain im new and the 3 schools are all next to each others in the frame and also some mail get stuck together and maybe that was what happened . She then goes on and on and on and i just said to her it must be great being perfect and how well she mustve done when she started her job with no mistakes at the beginning .

Now i go in and drop the mail on her desk and leave without even looking at her . Another woman says good morning to me whenever she is in the office with her and i make a point having a laugh with her in front of the devil b*tch .

My question is ......... WHAT THE F*CK IS HER PROBLEM ? ? Does it matter if there was ONE or a HUNDRED miss sorts in her mail ?? What the hell is it to her ??

Rant over

I think her problem was she is not getting "it" and Vibrator is stuck in the Postie

That's no way to talk about colleagues - remember the DRAW Guidelines ( shame some lineos don't )

[baldrick]

Reminds me of the joke: Why do estate agents avoid looking out of the window during the morning?

Answer: So that they'll have something to do in the afternoon!

[bogstandard]

what about "i dunno mate but it either rattles or it's broke"

[vigilante]

Use the postpersons vengance code
There is always a way to get them back----legally that is

[not me]

next time if you can get ot them before they open and P739 away ;)

[krussel]

I used to deliver to an Estate agents a few years back i went in with a package A4 full of paper work from a solicitor which was grossly underpaid. The total cost came to 97p which included the then 50p handling charge. The guy in charge did not want to pay 50p and started ranting and raving about it even bringing out a "Tomy my first scales" to try to prove it was not over weight, pathic he was like a child. He held out the 47p but i stuck to my guns and pointing out to the car park and asking "is that your Porsche turbo out there, nice car" (houses were booming back then). He replies "yes it is and i did'nt get by giving 50p's to bloody dimwits like you". With that i simply turned and walked out. When i got back to the office i wasted no time in killing it off and sending it out on the missort run. Anyway this twit turns up later that day with his 97p demanding his packet and they told him it had been returned. He hit the roof as it was the completion paperwork of a large property deal. He ended up making a big fuss about the whole thing and i was told to simply P739 any charges in future and not to speak with him. Sweet job done!

[Wiltshireboy]

Id say E.....proper Wiltshire Charm

[Sandyman]

Use the postpersons vengance code
There is always a way to get them back----legally that is

Hmm. House I delivered to many years ago. Quite posh. Alsatian dog was a right angry sod, but nothing but a sweet little darling in the eyes of the owners. One second delivery i had (clearly visible through the envelope window) some share certificates for this household. Dog going crazy behind letter box. I carefully pop envelope through the letterbox as per regulations but dog shreds it. Suppose I could've rung the bell to alert them but they were so indifferent to the problems I had with their dog, I decided against it.

The next morning, a wall mounted postbox is at the end of the drive. Result.

[Stormproof]

Delivered to a house this morning that is also a business, electric gates etc, the owner (drinking coffee & eating toast) was out in the yard with the 3 dogs, I stood there like a lemon for about 5 mins before she acknowledged me, then she said the side gate is open, I told her I don't enter properties with loose dogs, got the usual 'they are harmless', to which I replied 'thats what all the owners have said before their dogs have bit me!' gave her the mail and walked away. They've no fecking idea

[Sandyman]

Delivered to a house this morning that is also a business, electric gates etc, the owner (drinking coffee & eating toast) was out in the yard with the 3 dogs, I stood there like a lemon for about 5 mins before she acknowledged me, then she said the side gate is open, I told her I don't enter properties with loose dogs, got the usual 'they are harmless', to which I replied 'thats what all the owners have said before their dogs have bit me!' gave her the mail and walked away. They've no fecking idea

No idea at all!
Some time ago, one of my now retired pals was given the "he won't bite you" line. He ended up with 16 stitches in his leg and the dog was dead by teatime thanks to the involvement of the Police.
When i politely share this tale with customers who have unruly dogs, and add the line "I would hate that to happen to your dog or my leg", they look somewhat shocked.

[POSTMAN]

Use the postpersons vengance code
There is always a way to get them back----legally that is

Hmm. House I delivered to many years ago. Quite posh. Alsatian dog was a right angry sod, but nothing but a sweet little darling in the eyes of the owners. One second delivery i had (clearly visible through the envelope window) some share certificates for this household. Dog going crazy behind letter box. I carefully pop envelope through the letterbox as per regulations but dog shreds it. Suppose I could've rung the bell to alert them but they were so indifferent to the problems I had with their dog, I decided against it.

The next morning, a wall mounted postbox is at the end of the drive. Result.

Yes i usually pop envelope through the letterbox as per regulations,but sometime i have to do the in out and shake it all about thing.

[banner18]

It baffles me as to why people can be funny like this with people that are providing a service to them? Mind you, when you hear about ambulance drivers being attacked and nurses and doctors abused in hospitals, we as posties, come a lot lower down on the list.

I remember once, a lady caught me in the street and asked me, in an aggressive manner, if I had a parcel for her. I knew I didn't, but she insisted I emptied my bag etc.. I was as nice as pie and mentioned that it would probably arrive in the next few days. Next thing, she starts going ape s**t, accusing me of stealing and lying and she was going to report me etc... Somehow I kept my cool but as I walked away I thought 'Im going to get you back for that, mark my words'.

Two days later, the parcel arrives on my fitting, but what a shame, it didn't have a number on it, so it took a nice trip back to those that sent it!
About a week later the parcel had been resent, fully addressed. It's funny though, because I knew this woman was always out after 12o'clock, so I decided to do my round a slightly different way, and what a crying shame, she had a 739 card left so she had to pick it up from the office. Strangely enough, the woman has never spoken to me since.

[DGP1]

Yes i usually pop envelope through the letterbox as per regulations,but sometime i have to do the in out and shake it all about thing.

I'm glad I'm not the only one who does that