New Royal Mail Uniform Ooo Er Matron!

[paul_skinback]

Up early on a sunday and read this in my snoozpaper. Soem of these our lady posties may be able to answer:

1) Is this going to be part of the new uniform and is it only available in red?
2) Do they come in whale size?
3) Will my bum itch when I get a wedgy on my round?
4) Is my DOM going to try to kiss me?
5) What if it gets caught when i get off my bike, will in catapault me across the road?


Postman Caught In Women's Thong Stolen From Parcel
Mar 15 2008 By Karen Bale

A POSTMAN who stole a package containing women's underwear was found wearing the lingerie.

Matthew Furness, 35, was trapped by suspicious bosses who planted a parcel containing a bra and thong in his van.

He denied stealing the package, despite being seen on CCTV, and police were called.

When the officers strip searched him, they found he was wearing the thong under his clothing.

A court was told that Royal Mail bosses became suspicious of Furness when they found an open package in his van.

They planted a series of packages to test him out between October and December last year.

First, they dropped a horror DVD into his bag, which should have been turned over to the mis-sort department.

When it failed to appear, they placed the bra and thong, worth a total of £49, in his van.

Bob Booker, prosecuting, told magistrates in Weymouth, Dorset, that Furness was seen on CCTV keeping the items for himself.

He said investigators were called in but Furness denied stealing them and claimed he was being "stitched up."

Mr Booker said Furness agreed to be personally searched by police but refused a search of his home.

He added: "Police searched him looking for items of ladies' underwear.

"They asked him to remove what he was wearing in the presence of an officer and found him to be wearing the thong.

"The other item - the bra - was never recovered."

Mr Booker said a later search at Furness's home uncovered the horror DVD.

Furness admitted two counts of theft.

Ian Brazier, defending, said it was an opportunist, rather than sophisticated, theft.

He said that Furness maintained he found the DVD in the post van he was driving and had only borrowed it.

Mr Brazier added that his client was undergoing counselling for "matters in his past".

Magistrates adjourned sentencing until April so reports could be prepared.

[not me]

already posted in 'news'