Poor old Royal Mail has had it,

[TrueBlueTerrier]

Poor old Royal Mail has had it, says sweetie-sucking Lord Mandelson

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/artic ... elson.html

To Peter Mandelson's new lair, the Lords, amid whose carpeted comforts, twinkling Throne and gargoyled cornices his shimmering self seems greatly at home.

But two months there and already he behaves as though he owns the place.

His lordship, sucking hard on some sweetie (I mean confectionery), made a statement in his capacity as Business Secretary. He announced that poor old Royal Mail, in its current form, has had it.

Pity, really. One of the great institutions of our kingdom, inherited from the Victorians, has been scythed down by bonus-chasing managerialism and bloody-minded trade unionism. Another triumph.

Lord Mandelson held his groin against the Table, standing at an angle. His legs and spine curved like a branch of hazel. He was wearing his spectacles - serious mode, see? - and his voice was wet with concern.

He spoke slowly and quite loudly. In the House of Lords this is always a good idea.

Around him sat various Labour women, beady-eyed with adoration.

To the left was cruel Lady Vadera, 'Shriti the Shriek', feared for her lizard tongue and closeness to the Prime Minister. A few feet to the right perched Lady Royall, copperish hair swept to one side like a clifftop gorse.

Chinless Lady Royall, onetime close friend of Lord Kinnock, has somehow made it to Leader of the House. Her eyes were open but there was no obvious sign of intelligent life.

Moments earlier we had heard from some roly-poly non-entity of a minister called Lady Thornton who put together a meaningless melange of cliche, slogans and platitudes.

In former times the Upper House would have glared such bilge out of court but the windbags and jargoneers of the political elite have colonised this old redoubt of common sense.

Back to Mandelson. Once he had made his little statement he was subjected to mild interrogation by peers. The sharpest moment came when Lord Clarke of Hampstead, an old TUC hand, spoke up from the Labour backbenches.

Lord Clarke initially referred to Lord Mandelson as 'my Friend' but then said, 'No, I got that wrong' and referred to him simply as 'the minister'.

Lord Mandelson, replying, called Lord Clarke 'my...Friend' but placed such a long pause between the two words that the effect was one of twisting menace.

Lord Clarke might want to employ a food taster for the next few weeks.

The Tories' spokesman was lean, hairoiled Lord De Mauley, who could be some raffish villain from 1930s Hollywood. He suggested that the Brown regime has its eye on the £22billion Royal Mail pension fund and will trouser it to solve cash-flow problems. I did not hear Lord Mandelson deny the possibility.

The day's other juicy fixture was the Commons Defence Committee where Quentin Davies, ex Tory MP now Labour Defence Minister, gave a vintage performance of blustering snootishness that would not have disgraced a pinstriped Tory Tufton in the 1950s.

One good thing to be said for Mr Davies is that he is not being paid for his ministerial work. We have therefore gone from a part-time Defence Secretary (Des Browne, remember him?) to a Defence Minister who does it for a hobby.

Mr Davies yarned and blethered and hawed and gum-sucked like some Harry Enfield ancient, incurably posh yet slithery quick when it came to animal cunning.

When the questions became difficult he handed the smoking grenade to one of his colleagues. Two of these were generals with fantastically shiny toecaps. One of them was General Figgures, a fruity-timbred fella with grey hair and oblong fingers. Figgures: good name for a chap i/c a budget.

So garrulous was Mr Davies - about whose lank, collar-length, implausibly inky hair there lingers a disreputable air - that the committee pleaded with him to keep answers short. ' Something like 53 words would do,' sighed chairman James Arbuthnot (Con, NE Hants). Mr Davies droned away again. 'I don't know how many words that was,' he brayed.

Adam Holloway (Con, Gravesham), with a groan: 'About 700.'

[Yahoorsur]

'Pity, really. One of the great institutions of our kingdom, inherited from the Victorians, has been scythed down by bonus-chasing managerialism and bloody-minded trade unionism. Another triumph.'

yadda yadda yadda yadda,the Daily Mail sitting on the fence,castigating the two foes of the green and plesant land that is 1950's England,God I hate that newspaper,it's a paper all about fear,fear of this,fear of those dammed Johnny Foreigners with their swarthy complextions,fear of those dammed Russkies,fear of anything that is'nt white middle class,us proles are only tolerated as long as we doff our caps and keep our coal in the bath,aaaaaaaaaaaaaargh ,thats better,a good rant does you the world of good

[DirtyHarry]

Don't you just love the way that middle class rag includes what it calls, "bloody-minded trade unionism", with the, "bonus-chasing managerialism", as an excuse for this latest example of British humbug?

The "bloody-minded trade unionism", as that pathetic rag terms it, was always in opposition to "bonus-chasing managerialism." Only a complete twat would buy that poor excuse for a newspaper. Oooops Just realised.......A few million do !

[Jennifer]

Guess most RM workshy chappies are only capable of reading ragssuch as the Sun.

[axeman]

beats reading items such as o.k and other such tripe the fairer sex read doesn't it ?

[pinstripe]

Guess most RM workshy chappies are only capable of reading ragssuch as the Sun.

Ssshhhh, don't mention that Murdoch owned rag on here. We hate that as well, along with the Courier.

[BELIAL]

beats reading items such as o.k and other such tripe the fairer sex read doesn't it ?

Dunno, Yes I do ,no ,or maybe dunno