Mount Pleasant Workers Fight bulletin 20/4/16

[anna]

Hi - this is latest bulletin - feedback good and bad welcome.

ROYAL MAIL ONE PLAN?
What's this all about? We should know, as apparently RM wants to put it into our pay deal! It seems they intend to classify offices into "failing" and "succeeding" on a scale of 1 to 5, just like the government did with schools - and then put the bad ones in "special measures", closing yet more! WC-M across the board, but then what? Pay and budget allocation according to office "performance" - with everyone on different pay rates? That should cause a riot.
PS: Is that why we're not hearing what we're offered?

BUT WHAT ABOUT OUR PAY OFFER?
We did see on "royalmailchat" that an 0.37% pay rise was rumoured, however! To be self-financing out of "legacy payments" - and we don't know what that means, either! Yeah, all sorts of leaks from the secret CWU-RM "talks"... But can RM really be serious? Given past experience it's quite possible. Riot number 2.

UNLIKELY OUTCOME
On the subject of pay offers, of course, we don't think managers will go on strike - even if the vote against their offer of 1.3% wins a majority. More's the pity. Don't managers realise we'd just love to be joining them on the picket line? The result is due today. Actually, another rumour has it that our pay offer is delayed, precisely because of this little hiccup produced by the CMA...

WATCH OUT FOR FIFE!
The other ballot result due, is of course the strike vote in Fife over David Mitchell's unfair dismissal. Solidarity! He must be reinstated!

MINUS 5
Going back to that Royal Mail One Junk Plan categorising offices 1 to 5 based on performance: we did think that the tick-boxes may be useful for us to categorise the managers - but then we'd need a negative scale.

IMPROVING WITH NO HANDS? UNLIKELY!
Oh, we were proudly told by the Elephant that Romec recently got a 4.5 score - “up” from 3. We're not sure if this is part of the same "One Plan". Surely it should be “down” from 3?

MAXI JOKE
The mini fit-up for the whole of processing which is supposed to fill the huge gap between the number of duties and the number of hands in HMP, is a complete joke! Eight part-time and 22 full-time vacancies? All shifts included? It's so far from what we need in here that we wonder which distant planet these managers must live on?!

...AND WITH 4 LEGS, TOO
Yes, and we wonder how they can keep offering yet more EVRs while not filling (F-T!) vacancies? Our mates keep disappearing, and we then keep having to move from one job to another - in an on-going musical chairs dance, where we are the chairs...

KEEP THOSE MEETINGS GOING!
Talking about living on another planet, we're prepared to make an exception for B the B: he should remain on his asteroid indefinitely. Last week when he was absent (in a meeting - his disciplinary?) work was smooth and clearing was right on time… If RM senior managers kept him buzzing in meetings and away from us they'd be showing some uncommon sense!

NO NEED FOR NOSTRADAMUS:CHAOS FORETOLD
Oh dear, RM is into big machine moving again: 1 CFC and 1 ILSM will (we hear...) be moved in order to open up enough space for the long packet sorting machines. We know what happens when RM embarks on plans like this: monumental chaos! We ‘ll have to make sure that their incompetence is not paid for by us!

TOPS 2000: BOTTOMING OUT
Jumbo-Dumbo keeps breaking down. It's not that old, so we have to assume it's because of a poor diet. Instead of good quality leaves, they're feeding it far too much junk! In fact Door2Dusbin is apparently going to increase phenomenally - RM is propagating the idea that a printed ad has more power! Never mind that WC delivery postmen and women (and others) are already collapsing under the weight of this D2D junk!

MORE DRIVERS ALSO NEEDED!
And what about the fact that Deliveries is short of drivers again? (Were there ever enough?) We might have a lot of stamina, but not enough to do all the runs they expect of us and then still more!!

SICK OF THEIR GAME
We're fed up with managers pretending to know what's best for us… playing “know it all” doctors! They aren’t doctors, but if they really want to be, why don't they apply to medical school? Not that we think they stand a chance, but at least it’ll keep them busy for a while!

AND YET MORE JUNK MAIL
The “stay-in” booklet of Cameron & Co went through processing last week and we expect the “leave” leaflets any time soon. On top of that, the mayoral, local police etc elections - all that extra bumf to get our votes, which won't change society, but will aggravate our backpain. And with all this extra work, where are the extra hands?

CURSING IN THE RAIN!
Is this demand historic or what? Romec workers need raincoats! Yes - we've been asking for them for years - with no result - in a country where it rains every other day! Yet they claim to have enough money to pay towards our favourite charities... Our favourite charity is us! And we're getting very wet!

[jamrd80]

Hit the nail on the head