Mount Pleasant bulletin

[anna]

Hi there, this is latest Mount Pleasant bulletin 26/03/14:
And just to add, management is bullying anyone who's been off sick again...

THE SHAREHOLDERS’ AXE
So the first job cuts since the flotation have been announced: 1,600, with 1,300 among “mainly” managers... and another 300 cuts cancelled out by the “creation of new or enhanced” jobs ... for managers?
The share price made a little hiccup (down 0.3%) but at 582.2p, compared to the float price of 330p, that’s nothing. And maybe it would even have gone up, if it was workers’ jobs being cut.

ALL OUT!
Managers on strike? Well, Unite/CMA has threatened strikes before, so this time, why believe them? Even if we’d love to see managers on the picket line - and we’d love (!) to join them there. And no hard feelings that they’ve never joined us outside either...

NO PAY CUTS
We wonder if it’s part of these latest job cuts that some of the acting JV6.5s have been put back in uniform? May be a good thing that we don’t have to bump into them at every step, but we don’t agree that anyone should get a pay cut - not even these guys, and that’s what this demotion means...

GREEDE BY NAME AND NATURE
There’s a problem looming for Moya’s pay apparently. The Chairman, Brydon, wants her to get a “substantial” rise to prevent her from leaving! Vince Cable says she shouldn’t get more than 3%... But why does she need any rise at all when her total package is already £1.5m, including bonus and pension payments? So what if she leaves.

IT’S NOT ENOUGH
The majority (98%) of Quadrant mates voted to accept the meagre 2.6% on pay. But turnout was just 51.6%. This below-inflation-rise (RPI=2.8%) was recommended by the CWU, so probably most felt it wasn’t worth voting “no”. Sure, CWU leaders aren’t to blame for Quadrant’s miserliness. But why do they boast that our mean wages are “above industry average”, when all this means is that “industry average” is far too low.

SPEEDY GREEDE
We heard Moya Greede briefed management to speed up changes in operations... Changing what precisely, we’re not sure!? If managers want changes, they can start by giving full time contracts to part-timers, and bringing more hands on deck! Maybe they’ll need a “briefing” from us about it?

WORKING OUT
Seems that DO bosses are punishing mates who don’t “flex” that extra 30 minutes when asked. So when it’s a light day and we could go home early, we’re made to stay in and get given some useless recycled “task”. Or get sent out again! It’s just bloody-mindedness. If they want to see flexing, maybe we can flex some muscle for them.

OCD ZONE: PLEASE DON’T USE THE LOOS!
Sorry to anyone with this debilitating disease, but we really think Romec managers need urgent therapy and maybe even tablets, for their obsessive compulsive disorder.... They freak out at the smallest speck of dust or dirty smear... Is this a sterile operating theatre, or a mail sorting office? Don’t they realise that they’re going to freak us out too - right out the door?

NOT ENOUGH WORKERS, TOO MANY BOSSES
Seriously, though, the real problem is we’re short of hands in Romec and certainly can’t manage to keep the place clean to any standard at all, let alone this golden standard b*****ks. No chance.

THE LATEST BEE IN HIS BONNET
We think B the B also needs to get in the queue to see the psychotherapist. This might calm him down a bit? His latest craze is litter and getting engineers to polish “his” machine up... Not enough else to do?

JUMPING JACKASSES
Actually, other managers also get ants in their pants - usually it’s when there’s an audit. That’s the only time you’ll find the yorkies parked with brakes on and H&S observed. Otherwise they spend their time drinking tea... And gossiping...

ROYAL AUDIT
Yes, all has to be spick and span when an audit is due, very much like a Royal visit! We had a good laugh once when an audit happened earlier than expected and everything was in disarray - and another time when a VIP visited an area that wasn't on management’s plan!

CELEBRITY MICE-TERCHEF?
So Celebrity MasterChef is coming to the MP canteen this Wednesday. We hope one of our famous mice doesn’t decide to take the lift up to the top floor - and give the Big TV Cheeses a fright! After all, we know the mice can be quite clever.

HAVE YOUR SNORE
Talking about TV shows, we’re going to be fed the usual TV babble at Work-Time Sleeping. And having the "Have your say (or not)" questionnaire certainly won’t improve matters. Who's bringing pillows and blankets?
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