Crowsear from boardroom says:
We have given careful consideration to what you have said. We recognise that you all have families that you need to care for and see; you have mortgages and other bills to pay; you would like a job with a decent pension; you want your wages to be raised in line with inflation; you do not wan to employ part time workers (not give them a contract, pay them sick pay etc) and you would like your children to have aspirations of doing a job where they will get paid for the work they do and provide a service where they are not facing criticism from the public because of our bad management. We as senior managers and government officials, know you can run the service better yourself, so we have decided that we will forgo our million pound a year benefits we get from preparing the post office in line with our plans for privatisation; we will not represent the interests of private financiers anymore; we will not want the couple of homes; several holidays and fancy cars anymore. You can run the post office in the interests of the public and not our profits and bank accounts because we have listened to you. We have completely reformed and become caring human beings.
P.S We will not call job cuts and attacking your pensions and work conditions ‘modernisation’ anymore. We didn’t realise that you knew it was just another ruse for filling our bank accounts at your expense.
I dreamed that again when I was having a nap.
:cfo :lfo