Dying on duty

[bustedflush]

You MUST ring the office when your expiration is imminent so your incomplete pouch can be finished and not get loaded into the ambulance and taken all the way to the hospital which will stress the manager(s).

You MUST at this moment (if holding your PDA) immediately release it so your partner or relief can carry on with it. It will earn you a posthumous warning if any unnecessary delays occur while it's being prised out of your hands if rigor mortis has begun.

Your colleagues reserve the right to strip your body of anything useful such as working pens, water bottles or unredeemed betting slips.

If you are the driver on the round in question you will be docked pay in 15-minute segments for delays occurring when another driver is transported to where you parked the vehicle.

If the pathologist discovers teeth marks from passing dogs on your corpse which he or she deems to be post mortem, you shall be considered for dismissal for gross misconduct to avoid paying your nominated RM Insurance beneficiary.

So be careful people!

[hothothot]

Very funny!!

[Darwinsdad]

Two days after death, on your day off, you’ll be summoned to the office to complete the ERICA form before your DOM knocks off 10 minutes after all posties have left for delivery. He/she will then ask the 3 following questions:
1. Were you wearing issued footwear?
2. Were you in possession of a dog peg?
3. Did you get the specials delivered?

Upon answering said questions, he/she will spend 20 minutes typing b*****it on the computer that makes no relevance to your actual death, but absolves the DOM, the line managers and workplace coaches of all responsibility and places the blame for your death squarely at your feet.

You will then be subjected daily to a text message/phone call bombardment asking how long your reincarnation is going to take as the office is short staffed.

[NWpostie]

"Reincarnatiom" like you would want to come back as a Postie, I would rather come back as Jess the Postcat

[fezza34]

The person who covers it on day off cover never dies

[leelatic]

You will of course be expected to be wearing Royal Mail footwear at the moment of death or you could be took down the conduct code.