Been lurking the forums for a while now and will say now this is a bit 's**t' for my first ever post but it's dead serious.
Basically I had a dodgy curry the night before and needed a poo really bad while out on delivery next day, so bad that I had to run into the nearest semi secluded area, aka a bush on the street, and drop a log. It got me wondering what would happen if I got caught, aside from dying of embarrassment, I mean job wise, instant dismissal or laughing stock of the office but keep your job?
when you've got to go you've gotta go!!…..you wouldn't get sacked for that. ….maybe if you dropped your kex in the middle of the high st and crimped one off there it would be a different matter.
My main concern is what did u use to wipe lol !! p739 dockets are very rough
All seriousness though someone in our office got reported to police by a member of public for having a pee. Poor guy had a bladder problem and parked up out of the way or so he thought and did his business. when he got back in manager told him police were investigating a report of indecent exposure. After explaining himself he was advised to use toilets from now on lol.
I remember when we went out in the dark I got caught short and peed down a homeowner's grid I'd just finished before he opened the door . I pretended nothing happened
Seriously though is this a joke? You’re supposed to drive back to the office or go to nearest public toilets. If you’re that desperate knock on someone’s door and asking would be better than squatting behind a bush using the courier as loo roll ffs
Jpro747 wrote:Seriously though is this a joke? You’re supposed to drive back to the office or go to nearest public toilets. If you’re that desperate knock on someone’s door and asking would be better than squatting behind a bush using the courier as loo roll ffs
Easier said then done if you dont have a van and the nearest public loos are a 20 minute walk with a loaded HCT away lol
I was in Dublin with the (ex) missus and we were walking from some suburb of Dublin to Hoarth. I'd had about ten pints of Guinness the night before and a full Oirish breakfast that morning and I got caught short needing to s**t. I found a park and had a s**t behind a bush. The girl I was with had some tissues in her bag and so I used these to wipe.
Strange thing as well is later that day we walked to see Phil Lynott's grave and the lassie found herself caught short for a crap too. She ended up behind a bush in a relatively residential area having a s**t (no she wasn't a skay, she'd have just s**t in her pants if it wasn't for the bush).
Coincidence.
On delivery I always make sure I know exactly where the shitholes are and if I feel a stirring in the bowels I just drive to them.
Trail wrote:I was in Dublin with the (ex) missus and we were walking from some suburb of Dublin to Hoarth. I'd had about ten pints of Guinness the night before and a full Oirish breakfast that morning and I got caught short needing to s**t. I found a park and had a s**t behind a bush. The girl I was with had some tissues in her bag and so I used these to wipe.
Strange thing as well is later that day we walked to see Phil Lynott's grave and the lassie found herself caught short for a crap too. She ended up behind a bush in a relatively residential area having a s**t (no she wasn't a skay, she'd have just s**t in her pants if it wasn't for the bush).
Coincidence.
On delivery I always make sure I know exactly where the shitholes are and if I feel a stirring in the bowels I just drive to them.
Jpro747 wrote:Seriously though is this a joke? You’re supposed to drive back to the office or go to nearest public toilets. If you’re that desperate knock on someone’s door and asking would be better than squatting behind a bush using the courier as loo roll ffs
Easier said then done if you dont have a van and the nearest public loos are a 20 minute walk with a loaded HCT away lol
