Bereavement.

[Indy]

My father is very sick and only has a few days left.

My manager is a **** and I absolutely have no intention of telling him as this is a deeply personal matter. If I go sick on an unrelated matter is it gross mis-conduct if I get found out?

Yes, I’m appalled to say that this is the Royal Mail that I work for.

[Acca Dacca]

Tell your manager
Tell your rep

You must be very stressed.....

[aiden01]

My father is very sick and only has a few days left.

My manager is a **** and I absolutely have no intention of telling him as this is a deeply personal matter. If I go sick on an unrelated matter is it gross mis-conduct if I get found out?

Yes, I’m appalled to say that this is the Royal Mail that I work for.

Would definitely let manager know. obviously you don't get on with him so ask rep to have a word with him.

[Indy]

Thanks both but the thought of telling my manager or anyone else in the office of my fathers death makes this whole ordeal a million times worse. To be honest I want to keep it as completely family only. I hope people understand.

I was off not long ago with the flu. If I called in sick with that but am seen ‘out’ and reported could that get me the sack? It’s a white lie but it protects my privacy. I don’t want the whole office talking about it and it WILL get out as everything always does.

[aiden01]

Thanks both but the thought of telling my manager or anyone else in the office of my fathers death makes this whole ordeal a million times worse. To be honest I want to keep it as completely family only. I hope people understand.

I was off not long ago with the flu. If I called in sick with that but am seen ‘out’ and reported could that get me the sack? It’s a white lie but it protects my privacy. I don’t want the whole office talking about it and it WILL get out as everything always does.

Completely understand as it is a very distressing time waiting for a parent to die. but will have to inform the manager when your father does pass away. You will be entitled to a weeks special paid leave. then go sick after that with a line from your doctor who will sign you line as bereavement personally took 5 weeks when my mum passed away. hope this helps maybe someone else can offer better advice.

[rambo1]

Thanks both but the thought of telling my manager or anyone else in the office of my fathers death makes this whole ordeal a million times worse. To be honest I want to keep it as completely family only. I hope people understand.

I was off not long ago with the flu. If I called in sick with that but am seen ‘out’ and reported could that get me the sack? It’s a white lie but it protects my privacy. I don’t want the whole office talking about it and it WILL get out as everything always does.

Completely understand as it is a very distressing time waiting for a parent to die. but will have to inform the manager when your father does pass away. You will be entitled to a weeks special paid leave. then go sick after that with a line from your doctor who will sign you line as bereavement personally took 5 weeks when my mum passed away. hope this helps maybe someone else can offer better advice.

Entirely with you on this one. Honesty is best. If they give you any stress about this they aren't fit to call themselves human beings. Just a simple call to inform your line manager, when the time comes id all you need to do. You are ENTITLED to a week off on full pay. Tell them you will see how it goes but obviously are very stressed right now. You can then self cert for a further week and if you need to, and sounds like you might, you can go to your go to get signed off for a few more weeks. There's no shame in doing this. You NEED time to heal after this very stressful and painful time. Believe me your Dom will have more important ( to him/her) things to deal with. Take care friend, and spend this last time giving your dad plenty of love. It's a tough time, but things will get better, trust me. ATB.

[misstmac]

I am presuming you want to go off sick so you can spend the last few days with your father? My suggestion would be to call in sick due to stress. You do not have to be specific about what that stress is. You can tell them it’s due to family issues. That way you are in no way lying and not putting yourself at risk. Should you need to you can get the gp to sign you off with stress, they will without a shadow of a doubt.

I understand that you want to keep this to yourself (I’ve been there) however you are completely entitled to bereavement leave once the day comes so at that point I would advise you to make them aware. When doing so I would suggest telling your manager that you wish for it to remain confidential.

Thoughts are with you at such a difficult time

[rambo1]

I am presuming you want to go off sick so you can spend the last few days with your father? My suggestion would be to call in sick due to stress. You do not have to be specific about what that stress is. You can tell them it’s due to family issues. That way you are in no way lying and not putting yourself at risk. Should you need to you can get the gp to sign you off with stress, they will without a shadow of a doubt.

I understand that you want to keep this to yourself (I’ve been there) however you are completely entitled to bereavement leave once the day comes so at that point I would advise you to make them aware. When doing so I would suggest telling your manager that you wish for it to remain confidential.

Thoughts are with you at such a difficult time

Only thing is you can't be off sick and have paid bereavement special leave at same time so if he wanted or needed to go off with stress after the bereavement week entitlement, it would count as two sickness periods. Not that this is his top priority ATM, just wanted to point it out so as not to get caught out. Could ask for special unpaid leave though, untill his father passes away, for the reason you stated. Whatever, work is not his priority at a time like this.