A Real Job advert for Part Timers.

Post by **azza30** » 04 Dec 2018, 23:12

This is what RM should write in the job advert - please add as you see fit

Royal Mail - Not a family centred organisation that respects it's diverse workforce.

Require full timers but only want to pay part timers

Overtime available (but may not be paid depending on office budgets)

Work place coach but Non existent training.

Full uniform (eventually, but not decent waterproofs or summer hats)

Start times changed at managers whim

Rota day off (80% Tuesdays, then monday one week and Saturday the next week)

Holidays - you can have them once everyone else has booked and no you can't have odd days here and there. Also you need to book way in advance, so please ask local authority to give you advance notice of school holidays for 2020 now.

Management who do not care about health and wellbeing, but have extensive uneducated medical knowledge if you are not well.

Sick pay after 1 year - but make sure it's not too much or often or you will be fired.

Lunch break frowned upon - as you won't have time to finish and you know we don't like overtime (well, paying it).

Work more than 25 hours, but sick pay, holiday pay and other benefits will remain at 25 hours.

Creditshampoo · Post by **Creditshampoo** » 04 Dec 2018, 23:34

Bang on

Raggedy Man · Post by **Raggedy Man** » 05 Dec 2018, 01:00

And that sir is why I left Royal Mail. Spot on.

panch1989 · Post by **panch1989** » 05 Dec 2018, 01:30

Nailed it.

Also add, Christmas bonus... You'll work you balls off for a pro rata bonus even after working over 38 a week in overtime.

Postie45 · Post by **Postie45** » 05 Dec 2018, 05:54

azza30 wrote:
Rota day off (80% Tuesdays, then monday one week and Saturday the next week)

whats a Saturday off ?

EdRush · Post by **EdRush** » 05 Dec 2018, 07:41

Royal Mail are now recruiting for delivery postwomen and postmen with Driving at ANY DO WE CARE TO SEND YOU

Post by **azza30** » 05 Dec 2018, 09:05

Basic arithmetic and logic skills skills essential, as managers don't have them. PT = 5 hrs, FT = 7.45 hrs Put on same job = Disgruntled FTimer, Pressurised PTimer so no team moral.

crimson king · Post by **crimson king** » 05 Dec 2018, 09:20

Brilliant thread

Post by **azza30** » 05 Dec 2018, 10:32

Postie45 wrote:
azza30 wrote:
Rota day off (80% Tuesdays, then monday one week and Saturday the next week)
whats a Saturday off ?

I'll clear this one up - 4 Tuesdays in a row, then Monday off, then Friday or Saturday depending on which is forecast lightest day (you will work heavier day). It's called the ' Part timer Stitch Up Rota''

Post by **azza30** » 05 Dec 2018, 10:37

You will get to cover nearly all the walks (that take the longest and are the farthest) but never get a glimpse of those special few that are reserved for the special few.

Post by **azza30** » 05 Dec 2018, 10:42

Requirement of job - Please bring your own mobile phone and make sure it has plenty of credit or a contract - This allows you to call for help in an accident or to get the manager out of shite when bag drops don't turn up. (Also if it is lost or broken on duty - it is not our problem - get a new one ASAP)

Manager can call you or text you whilst you are having a family meal or doing something with the family to let you know what time to come in the next morning. This is because the managers can't manage, just supervise - badly.

south London postie · Post by **south London postie** » 05 Dec 2018, 11:32

Definition of a PT walk : any walk full timers don't want to do, but which they would get 7 hours to tie up and complete, and for which you get 5 hours (minus break time).

Post by **azza30** » 05 Dec 2018, 11:56

We are flexible and regard your H&S as our number one priority - but please don't have Doctors or a hospital appointment as we cannot work into non existant schedules for part timers (PS don't book in advance either as we won't tell you what day's you will be off at any point).

Postie45 · Post by **Postie45** » 05 Dec 2018, 14:59

azza30 wrote:We are flexible and regard your H&S as our number one priority - .

also please dont follow any of that h&s stuff we tell you, we dont want to be paying out 3 hours extended overtime per day - we just want to cover our arse.

Post by **fb1969** » 05 Dec 2018, 16:27

Footwear will be provided. Should you fall over when not wearing RM issued shoes, it will be deemed your fault. However, if you fall over while wearing issued shoes we will assume that you didn't carry out a risk assessment and it will be deemed your fault.