Patrick ‘Pat’ Clifton is an unscrupulous ginger lothario who’s fathered all of Greendale’s children, according to a shocking new report.*
The Royal Mail employee, who found fame as Postman Pat on the hit BBC show, has been sensationally accused of secretly shagging his way around the sleepy rural village, and hiding his womanising ways beneath a facade of guileless geniality.
Angry male villagers claim Mr Clifton’s striking mop of red hair and short-sightedness have given the ladies’ man away, because many local children born in Greendale bear a striking resemblance to him.
Patrick ‘Pat’ Clifton is a valued member of Greendale’s community (Picture: BBC)
Clifton, a formerly beloved figure in the highly conservative community, now faces a serious backlash that may affect his professional life.
Mr George Lancaster**, from InTake Farm on the outskirts of Greendale, told Metro.co.uk: ‘Down the pub they’re saying he’s had 12 separate invitations to appear on Jeremy Kyle.
‘Disgusting, if you ask me. Not that I have concerns about my wife, my sheep have been watching her 24/7.’
Pat’s wife Sara and son Julian are understood to have moved out of the family home some weeks ago, though one villager told Metro.co.uk neither has been seen locally for four years.
In the wake of these accusations, The Greendale Chronicle claims the postman is planning a holiday in Lanzarote, if he can find someone to feed his pet cat Jess for a week.
Even Pat’s cat Jess is loath to be seen with him during his increasingly dangerous rounds of the village (Picture: BBC)
Clifton is yet to make an official comment on the allegations, which were initially posted on Twitter.
*Yes, we made all this up. As far as we know Postman Pat’s only child is six-year-old Julian. We have no evidence of any womanising apart from some sly digs on Twitter.
** Mr George Lancaster is not a real person but, hey, you know that Postman Pat isn’t real… Right?!