Now Even RealBusiness Are Taking The Pi** out of us

[Geezer]

The Friday funnies: special Royal Mail edition

http://www.realbusiness.co.uk/news/lead ... tion.thtml

by Rebecca Burn-Callander - Friday, 6th November 2009 -
The Friday funnies: special Royal Mail edition



There's been a real buzz here on RealBusiness.co.uk this week concerning the Royal Mail strike action. So, to cheer up all you weary entrepreneurs, hampered by the strikes and worried about the New Year talks, we're poking fun at the culprits. Enjoy.

The strikes have had a huge impact on the UK's SMEs, be they online or offline businesses. Whether you've lost customers, run into invoice trouble or seen your goods lost in transit, a giggle on Royal Mail will make you feel better.

I posted this joke three weeks ago...
Blasted Royal Mail.

***

In the last 12 months, the Royal Mail received over five million letters complaining about its service.
As a result, it's been able to announce record annual profits.

***

The Royal Mail have revealed that their pension fund is facing a deficit of over £6bn. They say that without government help, thousands of workers could end up receiving a lot less money in their pension packet than they expected.

Let's hope it doesn't come to that. If there's one thing postal workers hate, it's opening envelopes and not finding money inside.

***

How many Royal Mail postmen does it take to change a light bulb?

178. On double overtime and time off in lieu. And the bulb's at the depot. You were out. Collect it yourself, tomorrow. We're shut. We're off home. Have a nice day.

***

My gambling addiction's really gotten out of hand recently. I'm taking the most ridiculous risks. Just the other day I tried mailing myself £1,000 through the Royal Mail...

***

Adam Crozier's CV makes impressive reading. He's run the premiership and the Royal Mail and left both brimming with world-class strikers.

[DirtyHarry]

They've nicked those so-called jokes off a Yank site, far too many Americanisms, even for pretentious middle class twats whose idea of hard work, is to sit on their fat asses tapping a keyboard.

[Stormproof]

Blimey Rebecca, I think Dara Ó Briain must be quaking in his boots, you are a hoot

[sevenandseven]

Isn't RealBusiness a site for entrepreneurs - awright Delboy?

Hear about the dyslexic entrepreneur?
He got out of the company after it went bust.

What do you call an entrepreneur's bank account?
Exhibit A.

What do you call an entrepreneur's tax return?
The evidence.

How many entrepreneurs does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change the light bulb, plus 23 accountants to define the new light bulb as a capital investment.

It is amazing what you can find on Google.

Clearly Ms Rebecca Burn-Callander who is associate editor at RealBusiness and spends her days writing about entrepreneurs and small businesses ( according to her profile) is too busy to enter the real world and become a proper journalist.

[Geezer]

Isn't RealBusiness a site for entrepreneurs - awright Delboy?

Hear about the dyslexic entrepreneur?
He got out of the company after it went bust.

What do you call an entrepreneur's bank account?
Exhibit A.

What do you call an entrepreneur's tax return?
The evidence.

How many entrepreneurs does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change the light bulb, plus 23 accountants to define the new light bulb as a capital investment.

It is amazing what you can find on Google.

Clearly Ms Rebecca Burn-Callander who is associate editor at RealBusiness and spends her days writing about entrepreneurs and small businesses ( according to her profile) is too busy to enter the real world and become a proper journalist.

[ExSG]

sevenandseven;

Brilliant and made my morning, thanks.

[dvbuk55]

Blimey Rebecca, I think Dara Ó Briain must be quaking in his boots, you are a hoot

That's not the way I'd spell it stormproof.

[Broxi51]

Blimey Rebecca, I think Dara Ó Briain must be quaking in his boots, you are a hoot

That's not the way I'd spell it stormproof.

[smokerjim]

Isn't RealBusiness a site for entrepreneurs - awright Delboy?

Hear about the dyslexic entrepreneur?
He got out of the company after it went bust.

What do you call an entrepreneur's bank account?
Exhibit A.

What do you call an entrepreneur's tax return?
The evidence.

How many entrepreneurs does it take to change a light bulb?
One to change the light bulb, plus 23 accountants to define the new light bulb as a capital investment.

It is amazing what you can find on Google.

Clearly Ms Rebecca Burn-Callander who is associate editor at RealBusiness and spends her days writing about entrepreneurs and small businesses ( according to her profile) is too busy to enter the real world and become a proper journalist.

I've got a joke for Ms Rebecca Burn-Callander....

How many entrepreneurs and SMEs subscribing to RealBusiness will survive after RM privatisation? Not enough to stop it from folding.

How'd you like them apples, sweetheart?