Best line/quote said to a manager

[islfor]

About a year ago, I was called to a stragetical meeting in our mail centre im from a delivery office, after listening to the cluster manager going on & on about decline in revenue, less letters to deliver & numerous other crap they come out with. My response at the time was so good I had managers from other sectors coming up to me in the mail centre canteen afterwards and in total agreement with me.
I said ' The way this business is going it wants us TO DO MORE WORK, FASTER, IN LESS TIME ' !!!
She was speechless and a few chuckles were heard by other delivery managers as they had never been able to see her been snookered before with such a true and simple question.

[Tman]

I said ' The way this business is going it wants us TO DO MORE WORK, FASTER, IN LESS TIME ' !!!
She was speechless and a few chuckles were heard by other delivery managers as they had never been able to see her been snookered before with such a true and simple question

She was probably surprised that someone should state the obvious. Wouldn't ANY manager want staff to work harder etc if that were possible?

[axeman]

While he sat gawping at them with a cup of coffee stuck firmly in his hands laughing at them ...........but thats o.k isn't it teaman yours is 'sri lankan' then i guess

[islfor]

I said to my previous manager 'That I will not be able to finish my round in the allotted time' he asked 'Why ?' I said, 'I need to be home to rewind all my DVD's' He just shrugged and walked off in a huff.

[borders]

it was my mates last day on Friday and just to have a bit of fun with his manager , he told him he was going to zap all his bar codes early on his collection. the managers reply was "i will take you down the Conduct Code" as he walked off in a huff-- what a muppet !!!

[Tman]

While he sat gawping at them with a cup of coffee stuck firmly in his hands laughing at them ...........but thats o.k isn't it teaman yours is 'sri lankan' then i guess

Message received.
Reply......"The red herring flies at midnight"

Out.

[POSTMAN]

"Kiss my arse" usually works for me.

[Big Daz]

it was my mates last day on Friday and just to have a bit of fun with his manager , he told him he was going to zap all his bar codes early on his collection. the managers reply was "i will take you down the Conduct Code" as he walked off in a huff-- what a muppet !!!

[dvbuk55]

"Kiss my arse" usually works for me.

Well whatever turns you on really - either cheek or both?

[Spedley]

I said ' The way this business is going it wants us TO DO MORE WORK, FASTER, IN LESS TIME ' !!!

Royal mail is spot on, efficiency is pretty much defined as "getting more work done for less money" !
... so they give us more work and pay us less :(

[Thorby Bislam]

3 or 4 weeks ago, at a WTL meeting on missorts. A line manager asked the room "What would you think if you came to a frame that had been badly prepped with a lot of missorts in it ?"

Immediately, I said "I'd think that you had prepped it M***** ". He just gave me an old-fashioned look and replied "thanks for that C****** ". Then he went on with his piece.

[bexhil palace]

Had this conversation with our area manager a few weeks ago.

Manager.. Could you tell me why you are always the last to leave the office, and cut off on a regular basis.
Me.. Certainly i would be delighted. I come in on time,i sort at the required rate,i sort on the IPS,i take my full meal relief,
i pouch up in line with the H&S guidelines i.e 16kg down,and i practice a clear frame policy which entails doing redirections and killoffs.
Manager.. Is that it?
Me.. I believe so yes.
Manager..Oh.
And off he went,quite surreal.

[madelin4]

Had this conversation with our area manager a few weeks ago.

Manager.. Could you tell me why you are always the last to leave the office, and cut off on a regular basis.
Me.. Certainly i would be delighted. I come in on time,i sort at the required rate,i sort on the IPS,i take my full meal relief,
i pouch up in line with the H&S guidelines i.e 16kg down,and i practice a clear frame policy which entails doing redirections and killoffs.
Manager.. Is that it?
Me.. I believe so yes.
Manager..Oh.
And off he went,quite surreal.

I love this thread! Well said here!!

[borders]

Had this conversation with our area manager a few weeks ago.

Manager.. Could you tell me why you are always the last to leave the office, and cut off on a regular basis.
Me.. Certainly i would be delighted. I come in on time,i sort at the required rate,i sort on the IPS,i take my full meal relief,
i pouch up in line with the H&S guidelines i.e 16kg down,and i practice a clear frame policy which entails doing redirections and killoffs.
Manager.. Is that it?
Me.. I believe so yes.
Manager..Oh.
And off he went,quite surreal.

I love this thread! Well said here!!

top class !!! heres another one ----one of the blokes who used to sort packets on our frame decided to give it a try as a Boss . one night he came over to us and told us we were talking too much and had not sorted enough Packet Alts. one of the lads told him he obviously didnt need to count to be a Boss , as we had sorted more Alts than we had ever done when we he worked on our frame. never bothered us again !!

[greynut]

We were told a couple of years ago that our 12.00 o'clock collection would have to be absorbed. Therefore RM would no longer pay 1 hours SA to do it. (We would do the collection and then go back out and finish off what we had left). So I pointed out that as we had been moved from one office to an office outside of our area, we were no getting back to the depot untill 1.25 pm and once we had signed off all the specials it would be 1.35pm. ( We finished in those days at 1.00pm).

His reply?

"OK, I ll give you an hours docket to finish off then!"

I Thaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaank yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeoowwwwwwwwwwwwwww