Thanks,but slow postage....

[POSTMAN]

From an ebayer to 'she who must be obeyed' feedback thingy.
Posted something to Aberdeenshire,are theses people thick ffs!

[fishtank]

Aberdeen http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Aberdeen" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Aberdeen (pronounced A-birdeen by the local working classes and plentiful crack smackheads and WANKERdeen but the upper class society) is Scotland's third largest city. If it wasn't for the oil industry it would be much smaller and probably a bigger shithole than St Andrews. Don't even get me started. Aberdeen is a town in the north east of Scotland. Discovered accidentaly by vikings attempting to reach the Faroe Islands, it doesn't have much in it, apart from a lot of people who have unusual yet intimate relationships with sheep. This bothers the sheep somewhat, because they think that if they're going to do things like this, they should probably do them in a place more exciting than Aberdeen (perhaps skegness?). Sunny Aberdeen surprisingly shares the title of Scotland's sunniest city with [Dundee] and its famous Beechgrove Garden was Scotland's first RSPB nature reserve for flamingos that flock here for the region's tropical summer climate. This is in great contrast to its harsh winters when Polar Bears migrate here from the Arctic Circle and may be seen on the A90 between Garthdee and Stonehaven on a regular basis.
The city has a long and sandy coastline noted for it's massive quantities of hypodermic needles, untreated sewage, used condoms. ABERDEEN IST KRIEG

For decades it has been an Aberdonian tradition to dig up the most attractive areas of the city such as Rubislaw in order to build urban catastrophes such as Torry or Northfield on the outskirts of the city. The most recent urban blight is the Stewart Milne development at Kepplestone; known locally as 'Tillydrone West'. This concrete and steel tribute to 1960's council houses completely over shadows all else on Queens Road. For those who have purchased a Kepplestone Manor apartment, or those who are just visiting, rumour has it that the floors can only support a maximum of 10 people. Given that most parties take place in the kitchen this could be socially limiting.


The "granite" also makes Aberdeen the world's most radioactive city and the Geiger counter was invented here by James Clerk Maxwell, former professor at the ancient University of Aberdeen who also discovered the major rules behind electromagnetism, the kinetic theory behind gases and founded Cove Rangers FC in 1857. Microbiologists at this institute in the 1970s were also responsible for using this background radiation to develop genetically engineered seagulls the size of small labradors. These can still be found at Aberdeen beach and the city retired undefeated in 1997 with UK's highest 'death by seagull' mortality rate. This technology was soon outlawed by the Turkish government before the revolutionary work was used to build the Dounreay nuclear power station in Caithness.

On an overcast day, because of the city being entirely grey, it becomes camouflaged. If you wander around Aberdeen on an overcast day, you may find yourself bumping into walls you thought were just part of the cloud. Aeroplanes have been known to mysteriously crash in the middle of Union Street. This is also due to camouflage. These accidents can be useful as it means that people can see through the cloud because of the resulting fires.

[TeeferTiger]

PMSL

[POSTMAN]

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Royal_mail" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[TrueBlueTerrier]

http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Huddersfield" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

[DGP1]

Teebs, I didn't realise your police are now armed with Bat'leths