Are all our customers "strange" ?

[Thunderthighs]

Got a phone call today, from what sounded like a very old lady.
I'll give an abridged version...

Lady "Got a card, saying you have 2 parcels for me." I take the name/address, and search for them, to confirm they are here. Can't find them.
Me "Sorry, they don't appear to be here. I'll take your details and call you back."
Lady "It says to call in before 5pm, I'm coming around now."
Me " I'm awfully sorry, but you would be wasting a journey, I will get back to you asap..."
Lady " The card says to call in, IM COMING AROUND NOW!!!"
Me "But they are not physically here. If they arrive I can contact you and get them re-delivered tomorrow."
Lady "No, I want them now, they are important, and I will be in work tomorrow."
The line goes dead...

30 seconds later two lads doing "cut offs" arrive, with her parcels...N/A'd, no one in at the time they called.

She didn't call in, so, they couldn't have been THAT IMPORTANT THEN...

[windermeredave]

had a guy call in this week,on the card was wriiten "parcel left in your metre cupboard" took me ages to get the message through to him.
other people call and think they need to make an appointment to come in and collect items, yes the public can be very strange sometimes.

[NewPostieUK]

They don't come any stranger than those that put plants in front of their letterboxes, or a hanging plant basket each side of their front door.

There's one old couple, they've got a plant each side of their path, overgrown and meeting in the middle, the only way past is to go on the garden - yup, you guessed it, they complained about postmen walking on their garden.

[BELIAL]

Recorded for a lady of Germanic stock
Knock, knock
Good morning ,I have a packet for you that requires your signature. If you could print and sign here at no, 2
"this is not no. 2 it is no.4 and I am not expecting anything"
No , I know you live at no.4 but could you sign at the second slot on the card please. You never know it might be a nice surprise
"It will not be a nice surprise, I am not expecting anything"

[dohnut]

Recorded for a lady of Germanic stock
Knock, knock
Good morning ,I have a packet for you that requires your signature. If you could print and sign here at no, 2
"this is not no. 2 it is no.4 and I am not expecting anything"
No , I know you live at no.4 but could you sign at the second slot on the card please. You never know it might be a nice surprise
"It will not be a nice surprise, I am not expecting anything"

LOL , people are c***s

[Thunderthighs]

Yep, had a lady ring, saying the postman had broken her gate lock.

"I had to lock my gate due to the break-in, you see..."

So, she's complaining about not getting her mail, but she's LOCKED her garden gate, then is complaining about that the postman
doing his best to get her mail to her...

[smokerjim]

Yep, somebody, somewhere has to deliver to DGP....just like somebody, somewhere, has to deliver to DVB...just like somebody, somewhere has to deliver to ( continued ad infinitum)

[Terry Butcher]

Recorded for a lady of Germanic stock
Knock, knock
Good morning ,I have a packet for you that requires your signature. If you could print and sign here at no, 2
"this is not no. 2 it is no.4 and I am not expecting anything"
No , I know you live at no.4 but could you sign at the second slot on the card please. You never know it might be a nice surprise
"It will not be a nice surprise, I am not expecting anything"

I'll never understand how hard the instruction "Sign in slot number _ , please" is for the general public to understand. 9 times out of 10 i've got to physically point it out to them where to sign, as if the jotted down house number and road next to the sticker, not to mention the slot number, isn't big enough a clue. I would also say that 1 in 20 times i get the card back and you've guessed it - they have signed in the wrong slot, despite all the visual clues, instructions and finger pointing. When that happends they are lucky to get a "thanks" through gritted teeth.

The week before last i was put on a turd walk, of which i didn't start until 11:30am (MC cock-up), it was the day where over 2 inches of rain fell in just a few hours (yes, the hours us poor sods are out delivering!) and there was major local flooding. I had a recorded and knocked on the door, a middle-aged woman answered, "Can you sign here" etc etc, I got and the question "But what is it?" as a response. I DON'T BLOODY KNOW WHAT IT IS! She got her daughter to the door as i shrugged my shoulders, again - "But what is it?, who sent it?" I DON'T BLOODY KNOW! Finally her son came to the door and reluctantly signed for it with a puzzled expression on his face . They had me standing in the pouring rain at thier front door for a good 3-4 minutes, asking questions to which i couldn't possibly have the answers to.

I'm also amazed at how the general public think you are an A-Z/yellow pages and know of every single road and business within a 20 mile radius, "Sorry mate, i couldn't tell you, I'm not from around here", "But you're a postman! " , "Oh, thanks, I hadn't noticed".

Also, having people hand you mail while you're picking up a bag from a red pillar box: "Sorry, I'm not collecting", "But you're a postman "

The list is endless...

[Postman Plodd]

Got one knacker on this walk im doing, pretends not to be in, watches you write out a red card, jogs after you when he's read it saying he was asleep/in bath/on bog/didnt hear. He's obviously dodging someone he owes money to or something.

Not as bad as the woman who also pretends not to be in, waits until you walk away from the door and then quickly grabs the mail from her glass porch and disappears back into the dark curtained sanctuary of her living room. You return and knock on her door and again she waits until youve walked away before braving the porch again to see if youve left something else. Either she's got a social phobia or im uglier than i thought.

I used to have to push my way up this overgrown path to deliver to this ramshackle house, the resident seemed to be a hermit or something, never spoke on the very few occasions you would see him outside. I caught him once just stood stock still among the bushes all wild hair and beard and staring eyes. Nearly shat a brick. When they eventually carted him away the neighbours bought the house just so they had a say as to who lived next to them.

Ive got a couple more but some folk may think im mocking the afflicted so i'll stop there.

[mdm]

I've had most of the above but what about people asking if you've got any stamps on you! Or is that just me.!?

[alloria]

I have a garden like this on my round, almost impossible to get to the front door without being covered in spider webs and bits of plant. The really amazing thing though, the person who lives there is an EX POSTIE! You would expect someone like that to understand.

They don't come any stranger than those that put plants in front of their letterboxes, or a hanging plant basket each side of their front door.

There's one old couple, they've got a plant each side of their path, overgrown and meeting in the middle, the only way past is to go on the garden - yup, you guessed it, they complained about postmen walking on their garden.

[dvbuk55]

I have a garden like this on my round, almost impossible to get to the front door without being covered in spider webs and bits of plant. The really amazing thing though, the person who lives there is an EX POSTIE! You would expect someone like that to understand.

They don't come any stranger than those that put plants in front of their letterboxes, or a hanging plant basket each side of their front door.

There's one old couple, they've got a plant each side of their path, overgrown and meeting in the middle, the only way past is to go on the garden - yup, you guessed it, they complained about postmen walking on their garden.

He does understand, he realises you are making up time and wants to make sure you don't finish early like he used to

[Tevez]

Things that me Laugh, Knock Knock! head out of the window, "Hold on postie cant find the key" what if there was a fire I ask them when they finally get the door open. They just laugh, its no laughing matter..

Can you just sign those two boxes please where I have put the two dots. Minute later, "Where do you want me to sign"

A plain envelope with no return address, can you sign for this letter love, Oooh who is it from, How the friggin hell do I know under my breath.

Av ya got out for me postie (voice down the street) only I'm going out, I whisper, then you'll just have to come back, What was that postie, I'll have a look when I get there.

And Cats at the front door going in and out of your legs, they start me-owing as though you have the key for the door.

You trap your hand on the gate, Woman is watching you and say's mind you don't trap your hand on that gate, you just bleedin done it.

You walk to the entrance of flats someone has the door open for you and they say "are going in here" No I'm just going to stand at the door all day.

Annoying. Taking your pen signing for a Item giving you it back full of grease from something they was cooking.

Opening the door after a p739 is wrote.

Ooohh Look at that rain watch you don't get wet postman.

Really annoying. calling you back for a letter, right address, but someone that lived there years ago...

[mdm]

Had one today 'hey Pat! i'm moving house today, can you send all my mail on' err no, stop being a tight twat and pay to get it sent on! For some reason he didn't appreciate that!:-D

[Lounge Lizard]

Recorded for a lady of Germanic stock
Knock, knock
Good morning ,I have a packet for you that requires your signature. If you could print and sign here at no, 2
"this is not no. 2 it is no.4 and I am not expecting anything"
No , I know you live at no.4 but could you sign at the second slot on the card please. You never know it might be a nice surprise
"It will not be a nice surprise, I am not expecting anything"

I'll never understand how hard the instruction "Sign in slot number _ , please" is for the general public to understand. 9 times out of 10 i've got to physically point it out to them where to sign, as if the jotted down house number and road next to the sticker, not to mention the slot number, isn't big enough a clue. I would also say that 1 in 20 times i get the card back and you've guessed it - they have signed in the wrong slot, despite all the visual clues, instructions and finger pointing. When that happends they are lucky to get a "thanks" through gritted teeth.

The week before last i was put on a turd walk, of which i didn't start until 11:30am (MC cock-up), it was the day where over 2 inches of rain fell in just a few hours (yes, the hours us poor sods are out delivering!) and there was major local flooding. I had a recorded and knocked on the door, a middle-aged woman answered, "Can you sign here" etc etc, I got and the question "But what is it?" as a response. I DON'T BLOODY KNOW WHAT IT IS! She got her daughter to the door as i shrugged my shoulders, again - "But what is it?, who sent it?" I DON'T BLOODY KNOW! Finally her son came to the door and reluctantly signed for it with a puzzled expression on his face . They had me standing in the pouring rain at thier front door for a good 3-4 minutes, asking questions to which i couldn't possibly have the answers to.

I'm also amazed at how the general public think you are an A-Z/yellow pages and know of every single road and business within a 20 mile radius, "Sorry mate, i couldn't tell you, I'm not from around here", "But you're a postman! " , "Oh, thanks, I hadn't noticed".

Also, having people hand you mail while you're picking up a bag from a red pillar box: "Sorry, I'm not collecting", "But you're a postman "

The list is endless...

And for a Special Delivery you've written the time '10.30' and they look at their watch and write '10.29' alongside it.