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How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Postal workers discussion forum. Discuss the day to day life in a Blue Shirt.
Sci_Dog
Posts: 292
Joined: 04 Dec 2008, 15:53
Gender: Male
Location: Northern Ireland

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by Sci_Dog »

Jimmy Carr`s laugh wrote:We had an arsehole once ,was one of them special coppers in his spare time and busted posties from our place over nowt. Mummys boy , never had a bird, ages about 48.

One day on nights he got a parcel ,open. Blow up doll. So some nasty old scrote aged about 60 said he`d teach him a lesson for all the posties he`1d fecked over. Took it off to the toilets and did the deed and left the contents in the gashflaps. Came out and re packaged it :Applause

Ive since moved offices and it was nothing to do with me :Very Happy

SERIOUSLY!?
Sad as I am please do follow me on Twitter http://twitter.com/purplemuffinman" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; Even just to check out my pic! LoL

You ever heard a millionaire say money is the root of all evil? Me either!
norbert
Posts: 3027
Joined: 15 Jan 2008, 01:46

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by norbert »

Sci_Dog wrote:
Jimmy Carr`s laugh wrote:We had an arsehole once ,was one of them special coppers in his spare time and busted posties from our place over nowt. Mummys boy , never had a bird, ages about 48.

One day on nights he got a parcel ,open. Blow up doll. So some nasty old scrote aged about 60 said he`d teach him a lesson for all the posties he`1d fecked over. Took it off to the toilets and did the deed and left the contents in the gashflaps. Came out and re packaged it :Applause

Ive since moved offices and it was nothing to do with me :Very Happy

SERIOUSLY!?

I've heard of " Sexy Sadie " a blow up doll coming loose , it was blown up & hung up :crazy: and they found old uniform to put on it :roll: - somebody took it home , probably on the basis that the addressee would be too embarrassed to complain / make enquires - not that I would condone this .

I've seen a huge vibrator fall out of a jiffy bag , it had to be sent to Surcharge to be officially resealed - must have been embarrassing for the woman who sent away for it when taking the packet in , or the dope of a husband finding out that his missus had decided to take matters in hand .



The story about the blow up doll sounds like the Bernard Manning joke about a bloke ringing up for a blow up doll and asking for realism . The Postman took it into the bushes before knocking on the door . The firm rang him up a week later asking if the doll was realistic enough for hom - he said realism , I caught a dose off it .
Last edited by norbert on 10 Nov 2009, 21:34, edited 3 times in total.
Sci_Dog
Posts: 292
Joined: 04 Dec 2008, 15:53
Gender: Male
Location: Northern Ireland

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by Sci_Dog »

If your ordered a sex related item like DVDs, vibrators etc etc and suspected the postie was opening or even stealing your items would you ring and complain?
Sad as I am please do follow me on Twitter http://twitter.com/purplemuffinman" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; Even just to check out my pic! LoL

You ever heard a millionaire say money is the root of all evil? Me either!
dvbuk55
EX ROYAL MAIL
Posts: 16650
Joined: 02 Jun 2007, 19:17
Gender: Male

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by dvbuk55 »

I know nothing about sex toys or blow up dolls or sexy lingerie or DVDs etc but a few years ago there was a company that sent out leaflets for sex toys etc people sent cheques, before the internet explosion, which were duly cashed - however they didn't receive anything and demanded their money back - the company duly offered a full refund but warned the customer the cheque would be endorsed "The Sex Toy Company" and to let them know if they still wanted a refund. They made an absolute mint because nobody wanted to hand a cheque in at the bank from that sort of place. Legally they had done nothing wrong because they had offered a refund - clever :Very Happy
DGP1
Posts: 15551
Joined: 07 Jun 2007, 20:39
Gender: Male
Location: Terminus

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by DGP1 »

dvbuk55 wrote:I know nothing about sex toys or blow up dolls or sexy lingerie or DVDs etc but a few years ago there was a company that sent out leaflets for sex toys etc people sent cheques, before the internet explosion, which were duly cashed - however they didn't receive anything and demanded their money back - the company duly offered a full refund but warned the customer the cheque would be endorsed "The Sex Toy Company" and to let them know if they still wanted a refund. They made an absolute mint because nobody wanted to hand a cheque in at the bank from that sort of place. Legally they had done nothing wrong because they had offered a refund - clever :Very Happy
Lock, Stock and 2 Smoking Barrels tried that to get the money to pay hatchet :hmmmm

I'm really trying to be not naughty anymore but this thread will get the better of me eventually :angel
I'm preparing myself for the zombie invasion, rule number 1 - Cardio
DGP1
Posts: 15551
Joined: 07 Jun 2007, 20:39
Gender: Male
Location: Terminus

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by DGP1 »

Sci_Dog wrote:If your ordered a sex related item like DVDs, vibrators etc etc and suspected the postie was opening or even stealing your items would you ring and complain?
I know my postman and his porn collection is even bigger than mine :shock: of course, like me he gets his off the net http://www.postalporn.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; :wink:
I'm preparing myself for the zombie invasion, rule number 1 - Cardio
dvbuk55
EX ROYAL MAIL
Posts: 16650
Joined: 02 Jun 2007, 19:17
Gender: Male

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by dvbuk55 »

DGP1 wrote:
Sci_Dog wrote:If your ordered a sex related item like DVDs, vibrators etc etc and suspected the postie was opening or even stealing your items would you ring and complain?
I know my postman and his porn collection is even bigger than mine :shock: of course, like me he gets his off the net http://www.postalporn.com" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false; :wink:
You can sod off - I'm not falling for that - and I'll bet that link is phoney as well - yes, I knew it would be :oops: :Very Happy
westlondonpostie
Posts: 559
Joined: 15 Jun 2009, 19:19
Gender: Male
Location: Close to the edge

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by westlondonpostie »

Had a GIANT black strap-on come through in a broken packet bagImage Impossible to keep a straight face when the lady answered the door, Didn't hang around for longImage
norbert
Posts: 3027
Joined: 15 Jan 2008, 01:46

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by norbert »

westlondonpostie wrote:Had a GIANT black strap-on come through in a broken packet bagImage Impossible to keep a straight face when the lady answered the door, Didn't hang around for longImage

The funniest thing on Blow Up Dolls would have to be the " Only Fools and Horses " - " Danger UXD " episode

This guy has put them up on You Tube and they're great quality for Flash Video - he's had to split the 50 min ? episode up into parts - click on see all or scroll down on the right .
http://www.youtube.com/user/SunglassesRon123" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Mr Blonde
Posts: 337
Joined: 23 May 2007, 20:44

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by Mr Blonde »

Sci_Dog wrote:
Mr Blonde wrote:I love how these things get sent in discreet packaging yet the return address makes it obvious. I think one is the Gold Group

:whistle
I know what you're thinking but... or butt :crazy:

Seriously, I sorted three, two to one person seperate large packages this morning from the Gold Group. They'll be having fun tonight!
dvbuk55
EX ROYAL MAIL
Posts: 16650
Joined: 02 Jun 2007, 19:17
Gender: Male

Re: How much sex related items pass through the post daily?

Post by dvbuk55 »

Mr Blonde wrote:
Sci_Dog wrote:
Mr Blonde wrote:I love how these things get sent in discreet packaging yet the return address makes it obvious. I think one is the Gold Group

:whistle
I know what you're thinking but... or butt :crazy:

Seriously, I sorted three, two to one person seperate large packages this morning from the Gold Group. They'll be having fun tonight!
Don't make snap judgements Blondie - they're gifts for friends for christmas - mind do you think we should try them just to make sure they're suitable :oops: